Please accept my humble obeisances at Your lotus feet. All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
In this time of crisis, people in general are looking for shelter. On the other hand, although I am wearing external dress of a Vaisnava, I am not ready to give up ropes which are pulling me in directions which are different than devotional service.I am in lack of Krishna consciousness although obstacles are on my path. I am forgetting the true shelter and taking shelter of everything that comes to my mind from previous life experiences; I remain frustrated. Although surrounded by all the facilities meant to remind me of Krishna, I remain stuck in old concoctions of material consciousness.
Praying to materialists, my desires get strength from the fuel that association is pouring on fire burning in my heart. I personally accept praise and glorification that devotees actually give to the service I am trying to do. In that way, hopeless and dry, overflodded with tears of self-pity and armed with sharp knife of criticism, I lose sanity and bow down to my demoniac nature. Neglecting scriptural knowledge and association of devotees, I became haunted by the ghost of Vaisnava aparadha. If he catches me, my life will be finished.
Please, dear Guru Maharaja, make me never forget this. I pray that I never fall from following You on the path that You are Showing, Path Which YOU Are Living..
Your foolish servant,
Mayapur das
| Homages from Disciples |